White Stuff

24Nov08

I woke up late today. Why? I don’t know…one of my two alarms didn’t go off. But I wasn’t worried about being late…oh no. Being late doesn’t matter all that much. WHEN THE WORLD IS COVERED IN SNOW.

As I was waking up, Speedle shook me and said something like “Jesse! Snow! Lots of [...]

Filed under: What the boff?, work shmurk   |  1 Comment
Tags: accidents, aflac, bella, deep conversations, drag queens, driving, edward, ice, insurance, japanese, lady part, michigan, penis, sex, snow, sparkles, sphincter, twilight, vampires, work

Why I Should Have Gone Before I Left.

03Oct08

Woah, hey. Hi. How are you?
Oh, I’m fine, thanks.
Did you think i had abandoned this? If so, you’re wrong.
This last week or so has been, interesting. I could go into detail, but right now…don’t feel like it. SO. Instead, I’ll give you the skinny version of what has happened in my life recently.

Was used as [...]

Filed under: I Should Be Embarassed...   |  1 Comment
Tags: butterflies, coke, crying, drag queens, drunk, flushed away, hot, hot pants, hot pocket, jealous, lube, nipple, phone, pilot, racism, sewers, snorting, sparkles, toilet