I’m Not a Zombie, but if I Were, I’d be a Gay Zombie…

31Mar09

Hey! You! Remember me? It’s your smart and sexy friend!

Alright, I don’t want to go into too much detail, but here’s the gist of what has happened in my life since my last post:

• I got fired. [meh]
• I got hired. [...meh]
• I have since trained at my new job. [I am now authorized to serve you food and alcohol! spooky!]
• I have almost finished playing Final Fantasy 8 [something I was never previously able to accomplish. Screw you Sorceress Adel! I just killed you! Bitch!]
• I have developed an unhealthy obsession with Squall. [The main character of FF8]
• I. almost, perpetually smell like Mexican food.
• Sometimes…I taste like Mexican food. [yes, this has been tested. Speedle told me so this very morning.]

So yeah, that’s what I’ve been up to.

Let’s see, I feel like i should include something funny…hm…

Ah! A recent conversation between co-worker’s:

L: So, I was with my boyfriend…Who’s Asian! Like YOU!
Self: …I’m not Asian.
L: What!? I thought you were Asian!!!
Self: Yeah, um, no?
C: We ALL thought you were Asian…
Self: Nope…definitely Mexican and Native American.
Manager: [just walking around the corner]
Manager: what? You’re not Asian?
Self: …I checked “Hispanic” on my application…

This continues to be an area of concern for most of my co-workers. Especially since some of them know that I can speak [some] Japanese.

Anyway, that’s about it for now, just letting you know I’m not dead.

P.S. Speaking of dead…ZOMBIES.

Speaking of Zombies…ZOMBIE PORN.

Speaking of zombie porn…GAY ZOMBIE PORN!

If you’re ever in the mood for a seriously FCUKED up movie, you need to see Otto; Or, Up With Dead People. It’s…really bad. Like, almost excruciatingly bad. The only good parts are:

• little girl gets slapped by angry german woman.
• main character eats dead rabbit on side of road
• zombie orgy [in which there are cut scenes of raw meat being cut, as well as a leg being gnawed on]
• zombie having sex with a corpse’s stomach [in which you see a REAL boner, going into a stomach hole]
• deleted scenes of zombie orgy [which is…well…a true gay orgy. And you see EVERYTHING. blow/hand/rim/etc jobs, anal, and cum shots! and raw meat! and severed legs! what more could you want!? TELL ME!!!!

Filed under: Uncategorized   |  1 Comment